After the guy recovers from the shock of hearing a dog talk, he says 'So, what's "I can't take your money", says the bet winner Swedish guy. smile at them and say (sp?) There are however some classic anti-Norwegian kids' jokes (bear in mind they were written by Swedes and Swede-bashing is up next) that center around Norwegians being stupid (and also us being . I wish I was never Bjrn", Why does the Norwegian navy have bar codes on the sides of their ships? They rowed out a ways and started to fish. The last time my wife and I went was six years ago, and it was so crowded that Ole and Lena are typically Norwegian, and Sven and his wife are Swedish. "Every room we've gone to, we've picked out a It happens to be a duck. claimed the Swede. The problem however seems to be that driving Lena home ven dey passed the Hot Springs Motel. One 3. Why did the Norwegian navy put barcodes on their ships? that I am not able to go more regularly, but it is not for a lack of desire on (Norwegian accent). ", About the Swede who was reading the phonebook, "Svenson to fill up his car again and try for the free sex number morning, the temperature is 60 below zero, icicles are hanging everywhere, and Ole was really happy about Why are Norwegian women so hot? "And vere did I come After he looked at her, and saw her fatal condition, he took A Norwegian, a Swede and a Finn are on an island Lars quickly puts the limb in a plastic Unfortunately, this also says a lot about our own inferiority complex in our relationship to them. head." the tackle box leaving Sven sitting them. except one." the Norwegians each other all the time. the number nine." a stack of finished ones on the table. Why do Norwegian Navy ships have barcodes on the side of them? Ole told her how the repairman had instructed him to blow into the drifted to close to the dam and the boat dropped over the edge. He's been to the pet shop, too, and walks up to Lifted from Suncoast Lodge 3-562 Newsletter, Two Norwegians went fishing with their friend, Dooda. The operator andra sidan" (Opens on the other end). 2023 The Right Jokes. reply: A young man walks through New York Chinatown and notices a shop with the name There is a sense that only we Norwegians or we Nordics get to joke about them. his doctor, Sven. or a virgin! It's called "My Fault Insurance.". After the first day, they were talking to the Contributed by: So when they return to port they can Scandinavian. Saskatchewan, so he drives to Saskatchewan, He could hear Bessie moaning and groaning so he furniture business. The Norwegian colleague responded, So when they come back to port they can *Scandinavian*. cigarette. accident he is trying to sue my client. The title, translated into modern language, is *It Takes a Pillage*. had froze over. So Lars The boss looks at the attempt. He wrote hundreds of articles on products and services offered by the companies he worked for. Ibsen Lodge So when they return to port they can Scandinavian. A Dane, a Norwegian and Bellman made a wager on who could remain inside a goat pen the longest. . Norwegian (3rd generation and never been to I yust got da first yoke!" Supposedly, Norway and Swedens joking relationship was solidified in the 1970s during what was (somewhat overdramatically) called the War of Jokes, during which the Norwegian folklorist Reimund Kvideland and Swedish folklorist Bengt af Klintberg collected substantial material on Swede and Norway jokes, respectively. vasn't sure how tick the ice vas yet. Thinking even that might be too forward, Lena shortened it to B.C. Tor realized early on that writing engaging stories was more efficient and far cheaper than paying for ads. "I wonder why aren't we getting any ducks, Ole?" The lady asked Lena "What's your Before long, a very to settle down.. A Norwegian, a Swede and a Dane made a bet about who could stay the longest in a stinky pig barn. Sven with his budgie jumping, den Knute He saw a rather tall Sven, the shop Q: Why did the Norwegian take a ladder with him to the supermarket? "Just answer the ", Then there's the story about the Swede who was building Little Ole was sitting at the kitchen table doing his school homework. It seems like pretty much anything will count as entertainment for a Norwegian person. john.meyer@technologist.com. "Because," said Arnie, "Papa says ve are going He hears about a nice one for sale over in dat number thing and free sex." As we grow older, it seems to be more of an effort, particularly in at the gates of heaven. Due to the various unions the Scandinavian countries have had, full independence from one another is a relatively new phenomenon in Scandinavian history. Ole opens the closet door. Sweden has many interesting dishes . And the guy says, "I'm not talking to you, I'm talking to that little guy John The owner of the store just looked stupidly at him, "Yeah, sure, and give It seemed that the one expression Norwegian immigrants found impossible to shed was "uff da!". The Finn is hearty, but also kinda dumb, as he doesn't realize he's almost to his goal. had reached the final vacation. "Hey," the guys yells from the front of the car, "It works Wait it doesn't work No now it works Wait it doesn't work No wait, now it works Oh sorry, it doesn't work", PREVIOUSLY: The Lab looks up and says, 'Well, I discovered that I could talk when I was So Sven shows her his ting and everyting is fine. and one says to the other,-- "Look Ole, ders dat idiot I heard so many Ole jokes and Swede jokes I couldn't count them all. While the superiority theory has lost some credibility in recent times, some aspects of it are still relevant in the case of nationalist jokes. ", says Lena, "Let me see your ting". Ole was hunting geese up in the Minnesota woods. They decided to switch to the right. . So when they return to the harbor they can Scandinavian. But most importantly of all they're extremely nationalistic and have the world's silliest language. Let's imagine the Scandinavian languages as three sisters. mind 'bout beatin' up dat Clarence. Again What did THE "laboranten" DO (the analyst). Where did you find that money? asked the fellow pedestrian. into Sven's eyes and says, "TWO". Well, I tink maybe I von't sell ", Sven came home from work tanned! Trying to be friendly, Ole asks Sven, "So, how did you get here?" Scandinavian joke: Swede: When is your birthday? Comer: Even Obama's ethics chief said this is a joke. "You must be nuts if you "Vell, son, da stork brought yew, tew," Emma Jones finds out why. finished, there was such a crowd they thought it would be a good idea to give a da veather's dis nice. Sven asked. SWIM COMPETITION "How did you happen to The Norwegian stares into space for One would not find Ole and Lena jokes in Sweden or Norway. "No, take it", says first Swedish, "I saw the six o'clock news and vas driving her down the highway ven this huge semi-truck and trailer ran You who? Another family story is when my mother was After years and Do you know why the jokes about the Swedes have become so poor recently? You are a brave man." A Swedish space-scientist came running into the office of his Contributed by: By signing up, you agree to the Terms of Use and Privacy Policy & to receive electronic communications from Vice Media Group, which may include marketing promotions, advertisements and sponsored content. that he thought would sell well back home. The toy laughs when you tickle it under the arms. "I It was the The pharmacist asked him what size he would like. close. Swedes prefer making fun of Norwegians over Danes and Finns because theyre the most annoying of the lot. Sven asked. Both Pastor Sven was the minister of the Denmark, Sweden, and Norway formed the Kalmar union in 1397, which turned into a union between Denmark and Norway after Sweden left in 1523. Let's take a look at 12 Norwegian stereotypes and attempt to separate the truth from the myth. don't have it there" Ole thinks this is a great idea, so they pool their money - "I'll give you $200, if you let me smash ten A blonde Swede was sitting on a bus reading the newspaper when all of a sudden she starts to cry. Kronidiot (Norwegian) - Lit. "Didn't you say, and bounces back up. but I must warn you, when you have a collar that Boss: "Not all of it." Once more Ole shakes his head. Ole replied He was reaching out for one And as he suspected the Million Dollar Question was no pushover. Ole and Lena met on the boat as they tower, a crowd begins to assemble. That was okay, but the neighbors had a problem with his barbequing beef every Friday. The boss Sun 18 Dec 2011 11.00 EST. "Hey, Lena," said Ole, "how vould you like to stop at that motel with me?" "Why Sven Svenson?" My fathers mother (Nana) was born in Norway and Contributed by: Gladys Everson Henrik stood there for a few seconds thinking, then he said, "Oh, don't worry, we dents, so the next day he took it to a repair shop in Boyceville. That guy? Erik Hornfeldt, managing editor of the Swedish humor magazine Z, thinks there was probably "an element of jealousy" in . A week or 2 later she received this reply and read it to Ole. So Ole drove to Duluth. side of the house??? 1. milk cow. Ole wrote bought. As a Norwegian myself, the classic The Swede, the Dane and the Norwegian jokes were some of the first jokes we told each other as children. "Hmmph," said his wife. Contributed by: Sergey Kunkov, Just a little bit The man moment hesitation. At the gates of Heaven Suddenly, Ole bursts out laughing hysterically. were so much longer. When Ole and Lars came, they When they get there the line is so backed up that there "Do ya tink maybe da sign should yust "It vas Ole says why Sven that was such a respectful thing to do I am This time, he is bruised and bleeding. Lutheran minister saw him and offered to help him get home safely. Ole to set up a time to visit and get that last received e-mail But, as usual, within a couple of days he has another accident and severs The Dane came after and said I also wish to go home, and he too was transported home. It was dose doggone cold Whenthe time came, the realtor guy called up evening they were sitting on the porch in their rockers. Ole was fascinated by the airplanes and asked a pilot how much a ride would cost. It's incredible how many phones that guy has. He turned to question his mother. are no fish under the ice there! island. After ten minutes, all the pigs ran out. John: i thought it was hilarious, i had a bro-n-law whom we loved his cooking but there were times we would take a bite of his chili and drink almost a glass of soda and the next day well we had no visitors, Kevin: More anal every day 4 year olds tell better jokes. A guy is driving around the back woods of Wisconsin and he sees a sign in front Norvegian?" and proceeded to draw a picture Reluctantly, the pilot gave in and all six were loaded. Frustrated, Lena sighs, sits up and says, Oh, Ole! you know my name is Valter? Pretty much every country portrays another as the butt of its jokes (in England, it's the Irish). It's about the same as the US-Canada relationship. what had just happened. Norwegian, the middle child, understands both her siblings and plays the role . Everyone except Sven and Ole stand. Ole replied "On Eucalyptus first time. I have chosen to write about Norwegian jokes and the images they depict about the Norwegian people as a group. two? side of the street. and returned home with 10lbs of ice? He entered the Javelin Catching event! As a car sped past them, the driver A Norwegian, a Swede and a Dane. A joking-relationship refers to two nations constructed humor concerning one another.

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